It’s Thanksgiving here in the USA today and all us good Aussies are making our own comfort food, Vegemite Sandwiches. If you have listened to the Men at Work song Down Under, you’ve heard of this magical foodstuff.

Here’s how to do it right.

The Ingredients

• 2 x slices of bread (most prefer fluffy white, I prefer a wholegrain brown). One is never enough, and more than two is only allowed after a vigorous rugby game.
• Butter or margarine to taste.
• Vegemite
• Cheddar cheese (actually New York cheddar is very good for this), sliced thinly using a cheese slicer.

Preparation

• Very lightly heat up the bread, I run it in the toaster for 15 seconds. Do not let it dry out or get toasty. The idea is to warm up the bread so that the butter melts easily when spread. There are those who incorrectly believe in buttering cold bread, but forget that Australia is a warm country and this is Australian food.
• Spread the butter on the bread. Do not overdo it. Ensure the the top of each slice is moist, but not soggy. If the butter dribbles through the bread and hits the plate, you’ve put too much on and should start again.

• Spread the Vegemite on top of the butter. The Vegemite should be slathered thick, and be spread to all edges of the bread. Leaving un-Vegemited corners is sloppy and proves that you are a pommy bastard who is used to marmite sandwiches where only the very centre has a dab of flavor. And while we are on poms, what’s with the marmalade thing?

• Place the cheese on top. Ensure proper coverage, but leave a few millimeters on each edge for cheese expansion. If you use imperial measures, leave a 1/18 span (1/8 finger or gnats-thorax length) between cheese edge and crust edge.

• Place the whole thing in a convection toaster oven where you get even heat from both top and bottom. In the USA, the broil setting works great. Do not place it in a pop-up toaster, your house will burn down and you won’t get to enjoy the sandwich as much.

• Toast on high heat until the cheese starts to bubble. Remove before the toast burns.

• Slice the toast in half and eat before it gets cold. There is no ruling whether vertical or diagonal slicing is appropriate, but all agree that horizontal slicing indicates a life-threatening condition, as in the people around you will kill you.

Yum!

Happy Aussie Thanksgiving everyone.

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