I’m not a subscriber to the Wall Street Journal, but I have noted the past few months that the WSJ seems to issue regular negative news, no, opinions, no, rumors, no, rubbish on Apple.

So I ran a test, I Googled wsj apple.

Here are the headlines that came up. I only read the blurb because the content is behind a paywall, and so include my guess as to what I expect would be in the article (and know wasn’t):

1. Has Apple Lost Its Cool to Samsung? Of course not, because Apple is selling more iPhones per quarter than all Samsung smartphones ever.
2. Apple’s Magic Wears Thin As Earnings Disappoint, when Apple had the best quarter of any company ever, but did not release the iWand, unicorns or fairy dust!
3. Investors Find Ways to Cope With Pain of Apple because the WSJ trash talked the share price down causing investors to feel the pain of stomach ulcers, so they took painkillers.
4. Investors Grapple With Core Reality of Apple which is a stable, growing and profitable company unlike any other outside of text books; oh wait, no, the WSJ does not get that.
5. AAPL Stock Price Today in which Apple is not mentioned (See the text underneath, it’s all about Samsung Galaxy devices).
6. The Fight to Unseat Apple’s iPhone Intensifies in which the WSJ reads the entrails of a dead panda and claim that Apple needs to persuade shoppers to go out and buy that which they are already buying by the boatload without any persuasion.
7. How Apple Bit Bond Holders, Too about reverse convertible bonds that don’t exist (and the reverse pun did not work either, sorry).
8. Apple Cuts Orders for iPhone Parts because Apple stopped buying screens from one shonky manufacturer and the WSJ failed to mention equivalent orders from other manufacturers and the fact that this was the post Xmas down quarter and the fact that this was a made-up thing.
9. Apple’s Shares Drop as Slowing Growth Builds on Investor Worries because of WSJ articles, and the slowing growth is because Apple could not manufacture enough devices in the last quarter to meet the ridiculously high demand?
10. New Worry for Apple in which they describe how Verizon activated more iPhones than ever, so I guess the worry is that Apple is doing things right?
11. Another Day, Another Downbeat Note on Apple because an analyst is worried about supply chain data that the WSJ made up and potential, yes, potential delays in products that don’t exist. Running syndicated repeats now, eh?
12. WSJ: Apple’s App Store climbs towards $25 billion in sales, oh wait, that’s a TUAW link that crept in, silly Google.
13. WSJ: Apple’s PR Is Starting To Feel The Heat because they sent out more favorable PR reports, which, I believe, is (a) what a PR department is supposed to do, and (b) a good thing because there was more favorable news to share, and (c) they turned the air-conditioning up.
14. Why The WSJ Got The ‘iPhone Demand Is Crashing’ Story All Wrong. It’s really sad when Forbes, yes, Forbes gets to call you out. Even I’m embarrassed for the WSJ on this one.
15. Apple Cuts Orders for iPhone Parts or did they? (Had to skip a page of results here because of all the reposts and takedowns, and the Business Insider links that are even more baity)
16. Apple Working On a Less-Expensive iPhone that does not exist.
17. Apple Moves Closer to Making TV Set that does not exist.
18. Will China Save Apple? from the WSJ?
19. Apple’s New Front in Battle for TV that does not exist.
20. WSJ: Apple testing iWatch designs with Foxconn that do not exist.
21. WSJ sues blogger for silly article, ok, so I made that one up.

Is there any doubt that the WSJ has its own agenda, and pumping out anti-Apple words is the execution of said agenda?

Come on, friends, it’s not serious or insidious, the WSJ agenda is simply to sell more papers and get more clicks. Nothing does that more than any article with the word Apple in its headline, and reporting and fairness and truth have nothing to do with making money for the WSJ.

Follow the author as @hiltmon on Twitter and @hiltmon on App.Net. Mute #xpost on one.